[PT] I talk a lot in my head

And sometimes, those conversations that just come and go are notable.

“So…how do you deal with all the assholes? I mean, they’re human beings but…”

Wait, what? “Assholes”? Haha

“No no…I mean, for those that just get under your skin…like they’re trying to fuck with you and bring you down. Or just being mean to ya, ya know? Those that can get you down.”

Well, whenever it comes to being slighted…I’m starting to learn, in the face of all those that fuck me up and swing me all out of whack and what not, I just “stop being sad and be awesome instead.” I know that sounds weird and probably inane but hear me out, okay? Whenever I get like that, I think it’s because I don’t have a lot of self respect, to let people do that to me. I mean, you’re not hurt by people’s mislabels if you know who are you. No names can bring you down if you know your name to its most honest level. Once you respect yourself and love yourself, you start treating yourself like you would a loved one. You’d never let yourself wallow in all those people’s shit. Sure you can be taken down but it’s about always getting back up. So you get back up and you be awesome instead. I do stuff that makes me feel good, makes me feel proud of who I’ve come to become and how far I’ve made it. So…when it comes to just reacting to those that want to see me fall…I fly. Simple, really. Though it could quite possibly be one of the hardest things in the world for those who haven’t learned that yet. I know I’m still learning that…but it’s becoming totally worth it.

And it’s hard ya know, always get back on the horse. Sometimes you just keep going and you can’t help but wonder, “what the fuck? What’s the point? Why do I even bother…” And then you look behind you and you can’t help but stop yourself. You look at how far you’ve come, even if it’s not much at all–even if all that’s changed is that you managed to live to the current moment. Because yeah, some times by certain standards that’s not success, that’s not enough. But you have to realize today’s a new day. And that day brings with it all the potential it does to a
“successful person”, someone whom you’d idolize and respect and aspire to be. Days do not discriminate, so long as you live to see them. Each second holds the same opportunity to those who are willingly to step up and get back on the damn horse. So when you look back, when you’re as low as the dirty treads of your shoes and you stop to think, “what the fuck, what’s the point…” Look behind you. That’s the point.

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