Here’s to myself. Here’s to being never enough but still doing what you can when you can regardless. Here’s to not giving up, it’s self-evident. Here’s to feeling pain and suffering, it’ll be useful one day. Here’s to owning my own shadow. Here’s to a heart that’s breaking until it opens. Here’s to someone looking down on me, making me feel small. Here’s to those who hate me. Here’s to those who loathe me, find me unbearable. Here’s to those who believe me to be pathetic, to be less, to be inferior. Here’s to the kindless villains of the world. Here’s to those who’ve cheated me. Here’s to the people who kick the piss out of me everyday. Here’s to those who make flippant comments in the passing-by, those that take cheap shots and disappear. Here’s to the rekindling of self-confidence, to the idea that the fun is in fact NOT “somewhere else” but right here. Here’s to those who have access to the most sophisticated technology in the world and all the things you could possibly want: here’s to those who are unhappy and use their blessings to bully others and I. Here’s to all the powerful words that come and go in my mind throughout the countless days. Here’s to all that time spent reading through random quotes to find the right one. Here’s to those who listen to the same song over and over again to feel something because the lyrics or the way the song permeates inside means a lot. Here’s to those who’ve wasted wishes, creativity, effort, time and love on those who could give less of a shit about you or what you’ve done/tried to do. It may not have been wasted, in one way or another.
Here’s to you, Reader, for being made out of the composition that I am and for being human, for wanting the same things that I want deep down regardless of our differences. Here’s to us, star-people. Here’s to living.
I apologize for the lack of updates lately. Life happens. I found myself paralyzed by the idea of submitting another blog post. I finally realized that I could move again once I tried to get it out, whatever that wants to burst forth.
*Also, I experienced difficulty trying to post this. I’ve had to post it twice now, only this one getting through I suppose but it doesn’t even have its title “Cathartic toasts”. At least, it doesn’t display it for me. Huh.